Title: Mulder and Scully Meets The Teletubbies! Author: Erin M. Blair E-Mail: eblair@sonic.net Classification: SHR--Story, Humor, Romance Content: Mulder/Scully Romance. Script Format. Rating: PG-13 Archive: OK to archive at Church of X, Gossamer, and Xemplary. Disclaimer: Mulder belongs to Chris Carter and the "Teletubbies" belong to the BBC. No infringement is intended. No Teletubbies were harmed in this story. Crossover: X-Files/Teletubbies Summary: Once upon a time in a far away land, Mulder and Scully meets Tinky Winky... --------------------------- MULDER AND SCULLY MEETS THE TELETUBBIES Written by: Erin M. Blair --------------------------- ERIN THE NARRATOR: Once upon a time in X-Files Land, there was this sexy male FBI agent. He had brown hair, hazel eyes and a low, sexy voice which was perfect for the bedroom. His name, as we learned back in 1993, was Mulder. (MULDER enters. He's wearing his outfit from the X-Files Movie.) MULDER: I decided to hop a plane to Teletubby Land to search for extraterrestial life with my lovely, auburn haired partner, Scully. (SCULLY enters. She's wearing her black and white outfit from the X-Files Movie.) SCULLY: Do you mean the "Teletubbies," Mulder? They're not aliens--they're furry, adorable babies. Look at the sunshine, it's a baby inside. I'd never seen a place like this... ERIN THE NARRATOR: While there, they had met these strange creatures with rounded bellies with televisions inside, and they gave them a "big hug" on arrival. TELETUBBIES (all): BIG HUG!!!! (They gave a big hug to reluctant MULDER and SCULLY.) MULDER: There's four of them! SCULLY: Shut up, Mulder. I can see that. SPEAKER: Time for Teletubbies. Time for Teletubbies! PO : I'm Po! LA-LA (the yellow creature): I'm La La! La La likes the X-Files! MULDER: Why thank you, La La! LA-LA: La La thinks Mulder's a cutie! SCULLY: Scully thinks La La has no chance! (She gives MULDER a forehead kiss.) TELETUBBIES: Again! (SCULLY gives MULDER another kiss. This time on the lips.) TELETUBBIES: Again! SCULLY (whispering): I think that we better show them a lesson. MULDER (whispering): Go for it, Scully. (He watched SCULLY stroke his hair, and then she kissed him much more passionately on the lips.) (They got up in time for DIPSY's introduction.) DIPSY (green colored creature): I'm Dipsy! Dipsy likes hat. MULDER: Wow, it's an alien! (SCULLY gives MULDER a playful shove.) MULDER: Scully! Look! Do you see what I see? SCULLY: No, I don't. (And now, it was TINKY WINKY'S time to dance. He's wearing a pink tutu.) TINKY WINKY (a gay sounding creature): I'm Tinky Winky. Tinky Winky loves to dance. (He dances a few seconds and then plops down on the ground.) SCULLY (whispering): Something's wrong with him, Mulder. (A short pause.) There's got to be a logical explanation. (She laughs.) (MULDER laughs.) MULDER: I know what you mean. The truth is... (MULDER gazes into Scully's blue eyes.) you, Scully. We found the truth together. (He kisses SCULLY on the lips.) SCULLY: Mmmmmmm... Mulder, I don't know what to say. SPEAKER: Time for Teletubbies to say goodbye. Time for Teletubbies to say goodbye! MULDER: That's not fair. SCULLY: Oh, let them leave! Teletubbies have to say goodbye, Mulder. Then it's just us. TELETUBBIES: Noooooo... ERIN THE NARRATOR: Nooooooo... Time for Tinky Winky to say goodbye. TINKY WINKY: Bye! ERIN THE NARRATOR: Time for LA LA to say goodbye. LA LA: Bye! ERIN THE NARRATOR: Time for Po to say goodbye. PO: Bye! ERIN THE NARRATOR: Time for Dipsy to say goodbye. DIPSY: Bye! ERIN THE NARRATOR: The sun sets down. Teletubbies say goodbye. Agent Mulder and Agent Scully go back to Washington DC...er...X-Files Land where they work another case. SCULLY: That's what you think. (She gazes into Mulder's eyes.) We had six or so years denying how we feel, and frankly, I'm glad that we revealed how we love each other. The truth is... MULDER: Here. (CUE the X-Files Theme Song by Mark Snow and then the "Walking After You" By the FOO Fighters. As the music's playing, the credits roll: Fox Mulder.....David Duchovny Dana Scully....Gillian Anderson The Teletubbies were played by...well, we don't know their names!) END Feedback: Positive, constructive criticism only. Flames will be used to torch Fowley. Send to: eblair@sonic.net Authors' Notes: I was going to write this is in story format, but it didn't turn out that way. I thought that it would be more fun to do a script version. I had seen several episodes of the "Teletubbies" while I was sick and thought that Mulder and Scully would love to meet them. It's supposed to be all in fun.